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Author Topic: receptivity in counseling sessions  (Read 165 times)
Sabrina
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« on: Mar 21, 2015, 11:22 PM »

What in your experience has helped you bring your interpretation about a chart to a place that it is best received by the person you are reading for?

I have experienced a spectrum in this - readings that feel very resonant and in alignment, intuition is very strong, feedback is positive, words are helpful and therapeutic. But I have also have had some experiences of alienation, in which the person was resistant, and when resistance comes up it becomes a deep ethical issue for me of how to proceed... usually it's in relation to a particular ego attachment or a delusion that someone is not ready/not desiring to let go of, but it's one that is causing them suffering.

I am wondering how people in this profession either, handle this, move past this and toward greater instances of being in alignment with healing -- and what facilitates really open exchanges in a reading setting? My desire is really to become better at communicating and understanding how to relate to people where they are at during a reading.

I have noted that people with higher levels of self awareness and more focused/aware desires are easy to read for, and they graciously receive perspective. Also noted - that the more I resonate with these qualities within myself, the more I tend to attract it on the outside. Hence why doing this kind of work requires constant self-evolution, too.

Is it then a matter of being discerning about readings, or is there a way to become more skilled as a reader for all? Any perspective appreciated.
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Linda
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« Reply #1 on: Mar 21, 2015, 11:34 PM »


I have experienced a spectrum in this - readings that feel very resonant and in alignment, intuition is very strong, feedback is positive, words are helpful and therapeutic. But I have also have had some experiences of alienation, in which the person was resistant, and when resistance comes up it becomes a deep ethical issue for me of how to proceed... usually it's in relation to a particular ego attachment or a delusion that someone is not ready/not desiring to let go of, but it's one that is causing them suffering.




Hi Sabrina,


I also have experienced the same spectrum. 

For example, one client absolutely loved all the information I was dishing out, and exclaimed how accurate and helpful it was.  I answered a multitude of her questions for several years and she seemed to lap it up. 

Suddenly, out of the blue, she accused me of intruding upon the boundaries she had set up around herself.  I had obviously touched upon a sore point, to do with Jupiter.  Suddenly I was accused of being self-righteous, and that is something I had to look at.

EA can be incredibly powerful.  It was at that time I realized an important lesson:  when to give, when not to give, and when to stop.

It is really Spirit guiding us when we do EA readings. 

Thanks for starting this thread.  I'd be interested in what others share about this topic.


Thanks,

Linda
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Rad
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« Reply #2 on: Mar 22, 2015, 05:48 AM »

My suggestions, as this is also how JWG approached any client/ birth chart, was to simply follow the lead of the client. That is done by asking them to ask the questions they need too for the counseling session, and only answering those questions.

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PatriciaW
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« Reply #3 on: Mar 22, 2015, 10:50 AM »

Sabrina…et al…

Ditto what Rad and Linda shared.  What you are describing may also be a result of the evolutionary state of the person you are reading for. Speaking for myself, my clients are generally either 3rd stage individuated or 1st stage spiritual or transitioning. Granted my primary work is regression therapy with astrology secondary, so not many consensus people seek out past life work  Occasionally though, I have had 3rd stage consensus to 1st stage individuated clients in both regression and astrology and, speaking from a personal level it is harder for me to see the planets and archetypes from what I might call a ‘personality’ only level rather than ‘soul level’ but that is what those sessions require.
I like to explain things in story or case study…  one example…3rd stage consensus to 1st stage Individuated. A Pluto in Cancer generation woman ( yes God bless her for seeking out an astrologer!!) During our reading our conversation covered her current interests..the retirement home she was living in, crochet dolls she was making, her husband… etc.. She shared with me also a lifelong interest in tarot and astrology that she “did on her own” and never really shared with her friends or husband cause they weren’t interested. But that she was feeling the urge to… (my words)…now come out of the closet.  She shyly asked me if I thought it would be okay if she did some tarot reading or charts for her friends at the retirement home  I told her to wait a minute while I left the session room to get a poem to read her….

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat that doesn't go, and doesn't suit me,
And I shall spend my pension
on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals,
and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I am tired,
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells,
And run my stick along the public railings,
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens,
And learn to spit…. (etc …etc…the poem goes on but you get the idea)
Jenny Joseph

We spent the rest of the session laughing and devising ways for her to now giver herself permission to WEAR PURPLE!!!  Guess what she is doing now ?  Smiley

On a deeper level, to me that was a soul urge, peeking out thru her personality asking for affirmation…a definite urge towards Individuation. As we know in EA this is a crucial issue for those transitioning between 3rd stage consensus to 1st Individuated. In reality that one thing is all she came to me for…simple and sweet. Sometimes sessions are like that despite all the other things I could see in her chart, or could have put out to discuss, none of it was the point of her session, and as Rad said follow the lead of the client. Further to that there is a funny saying in counseling circles…. “ Never work harder than your clients”!!!!! As a Pluto in Virgo in the 6th house it took me YEARS to learn that!!!

A further thought on this brings to mind a recent conversation I had with another EA astrologer at a conference as we were talking about trends in the astro world in general and both of us shared the observation… in the general astrology world ( EA aside)  the predominate model, put out by mostly the popular “rock star” astrologers of the Pluto in Leo generation is a ‘performance model’ whereas the astrologer dazzles the client with their keen knowledge etc… Generally ‘talking at their client’ for the entire session.  Add to that Astrology’s long history as simply a tool for divination as well.  Because of that approach many astrologers feel they have to perform or prove themselves during a reading. But as the Pluto Virgos and Pluto Libras are now ‘coming of age’ and starting to influence the models, astrology as a tool in counseling/healing etc.. is emerging more. As well as a greater emphasis being placed on the dialogue between client and astrologer as a collaboration.

The reason why I bring this up is not because that old model was ever a part of EA, but because that is also what many people in the general public expect when they go to an astrologer, because that old model has been what was out there for many years.  As astrologers I also think it is important to be aware of the silent or overarching expectations that clients may bring in, because on the energetic level they affect us. It serves your clients better when you are in your ‘zone’. In my personal experience the more you are aware of your own style, gifts and limitations in your own practice and experience, the more you draw exactly the clients that need what you uniquely have to offer. It is more than okay to know what you are good at, draw only those clients and refer the rest.

Further to this from Sabrina.............
 
“I have experienced a spectrum in this - readings that feel very resonant and in alignment, intuition is very strong, feedback is positive, words are helpful and therapeutic. But I have also have had some experiences of alienation, in which the person was resistant, and when resistance comes up it becomes a deep ethical issue for me of how to proceed... usually it's in relation to a particular ego attachment or a delusion that someone is not ready/not desiring to let go of, but it's one that is causing them suffering.”

In regression work I actually teach my students to expect resistance, in fact if we do not hit resistance, we are not doing our job. But that is because the method itself is designed to get below the surface of defenses to core wounds so that they can be healed and within our method we complete what we opened up.  Defenses are a natural part of the human psyche… they are like a band aid over a yet unhealed wound. They are not to be judged, fought against etc..  In other words, hitting a defense is not a no, no.. its actually a signpost that you are entering delicate territory. it’s how you navigate it that matters.

As this applies to astrological counseling what I hear from you is your genuine desire to ‘do no harm’. I feel that alone is a powerful guide for you. In counseling work there is no need to ‘rip off’ a person’s band aid, that could be harmful. Sometimes just acknowledging and bringing awareness that the band aid is there is enough, people are not always aware of their own defenses. I’ve worked with many clients who I would describe as numb and ‘shut down’ from their feelings, both of those are common defenses (often built up over many lifetimes). Sometimes counselors/healers feel they need to push defenses... well I could spend a lot of energy 'arguing' with that defense or I could guide them (even to the edge of) or into any of their feelings. When that happens often the 1st huge catharsis they have is the realization themselves of how shut down they have been!  For them that is the first step to emotional healing. I’m not ripping off their band aid as much as giving them a taste of what lies below it… in that way I am engaging their own souls desire to heal…not my desire to heal them.  That is a delicate balance. Just like I mentioned before the profession of astrology has it’s own baggage and evolution… so does the profession of healing and counseling. We need to be aware of what our own intentions and desires and what our skills are. A simple reframe is to think of oneself like a midwife……. Holding space…. Giving encouragement when needed, pausing when needed….pushing/pulling when needed…breathing along with the client… etc…

If  you can figure out your own style of how to midwife a souls evolutionary process , or learn counseling or coaching methods that work in that way, to augment your approach, that might be helpful.
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