gonzalo.

[Deva]

Hi Ganzalo, I wanted to welcome you to this Ea community as well, and thank you for sharing your personal stories and experiences with us. I am thrilled that you would concider starting an EA school in Chile, and to have you as a part of the message board would be wonderful. Please do not hesitate to post any questions or insights you have on the board as time allows. You have already demonstrated your ability to do the work based on your own posts.
God Bless you and your family.
Deva

[Gonzalo]

Hello Rad,
Many thanks again for your help. I had a look at the website of Patricia Walsh and her work seemed very interesting to me. I shall send her an email as soon as I understand just a little more of past life regressions. On year 1999 I had a regression session during which I saw myself in prison dressed like a Carmelite. A thin ray of light coming through a very high window scarcely lightened the stone walls of the underground prison cell. Also saw me walking towards a city accompanied by another younger monk. Images resembled the story of John of the Cross. I was not very sure as to where these images were coming from, I think because my wife at that time, who had been told by an astrologer to be the reincarnation of Catalina de Siena, was utterly convinced that I had been John of the Cross, to the point that she used to call me “juanito” and was always making jokes at me because “I” had been so in love with Teresa of Avila. My wife was very persuasive, so I thought after that regression session that perhaps I was influenced by her as to what images I had produced, a thought I had also because in fact I had been reading during some time before the so called mystical writings of such great poet. Further, when I had met my wife at that time for “first” time, I was quite interested in other Christian mystics while she was quite dedicated to the stories of women such as Hildegard von Bingen, Marguerite Porete, Hadewych of Ambers, and other beguins and begards, while each of us had desires of entering monastic life. As I can see it now, the images I saw at that regression session and the story of John of the Cross can correlate with symbols in my birth chart, though I can also understand that said correlation exists at the level of archetypes, which, in turn, can also correlate with other much simpler lives, ie. lives smaller and also not so “spiritual”, more filled with too human passions and wrongs. I can also see now that perhaps some of those “great” lives and souls such as that of John of the Cross were in reality filled with too human contradictions and passions, not even totally sublimated but repressed to a high extent, though so idealized and mystified by their followers and by themselves, as seen through the glasses of their belief-systems and through their intense experience of trauma. I can tell that the same day I told that Jeffrey came to visit us and spoke to my wife we were also visited by other “famous” people. One of them was a woman, a “witch” whose hair was cut off and who had been terribly tortured, who had suffered a lot though had not retracted, whose soul had not been seeded by evil as intended by her torturers, a woman I think was Marguerite Porete. Other one was “the great one called Jesus” himself, so incredibly full of life and so loving and healing just by being here for a moment with each of us. So, I think that all this is happening to me for some reason, a reason I cannot fully grasp, though what I feel is that is occurring just now, and not before now, because a shift was necessary in my consciousness to be able to understand that what is occurring has to do with love, a love so big and so unconditional that I cannot pretend to understand and which does not depend on my own “merits”. In other words, now when I am a little more prepared to interpret this from a non- egocentric point of view, as I have gained more insight about my own limitations, “imperfection” and darkness. Stephen told me something about giving up the building of a myth of oneself, and after thinking on that for some days I think it has to do with this idea: that I am being able to grow to see a little more of this wonderful things just because my life is becoming more simple, and the idea of what my life can be, closer to what really is. It is kind of paradoxical because it implies that, upon commencing to give up the myth of myself, it happens that I do have a “mission” here. Further, this “mission” or task implies that new material, previously suppressed, originating from this life and prior lives, will need to be integrated in my consciousness, ie. that a new tale or myth of myself will be created by myself, a happier story in the end I guess, though including chapters not so happy. Indeed, my latest version of my story is too sad and tragic, and also, very incomplete, so I do want to give it up and then change it. A friend of mine says that all he wants to have when death comes to take him from this place is a beautiful story. So, I do want and am anxious to learn how to go back to those lives I lived, the simple or “normal” ones such as the one you told me when I left my family and traveled far away to make money, and also the other, more “mythified” ones. And I want to learn to do that in order to heal those traumas and also to help heal other traumatized souls, some even traumatized by myself at some level at some time, whom I have already met in this life, such as my prior wife. I think the idea Stephen gave me about de-mythification has practical application for me so I will keep on thinking on it. 

Hi Lia,
Thank you again, and all I can tell is that I feel the same way … your words had many echoes in me, and different images of you came to me when reading and re-reading them … it also happened to me with the words of others here … something like “changing words”, resonating at increasing levels or delivering new messages when re-thought … so, I cannot say how surprised and happy I am when feeling that something very strong and very loving exists here that has brought me closer to you … and, of course I am interested in knowing bout that therapy method you are telling me about …

Deva,
Thank you once again for posting this message, and I really feel so welcome here … I will be working to improve my skills and knowledge so that, when time comes to bring EA School in Chile, I will be even more prepared to be of help for that great task … also, I am thinking that perhaps  it could be a good idea for me to start a web blog that would serve as another local reference for these teachings and work so that more people in Chile will be interested in learning when that time comes … if you feel that I could be of help for anything else you think necessary for such a purpose, please do not hesitate to tell me, when you feel it is the right moment …

God/dess bless you all,
gonzalo.

[stephen]

Stephen told me something about giving up the building of a myth of oneself, and after thinking on that for some days I think it has to do with this idea: that I am being able to grow to see a little more of this wonderful things just because my life is becoming more simple, and the idea of what my life can be, closer to what really is. It is kind of paradoxical because it implies that, upon commencing to give up the myth of myself, it happens that I do have a “mission” here. Further, this “mission” or task implies that new material, previously suppressed, originating from this life and prior lives, will need to be integrated in my consciousness, ie. that a new tale or myth of myself will be created by myself, a happier story in the end I guess, though including chapters not so happy. Indeed, my latest version of my story is too sad and tragic, and also, very incomplete, so I do want to give it up and then change it. A friend of mine says that all he wants to have when death comes to take him from this place is a beautiful story. So, I do want and am anxious to learn how to go back to those lives I lived, the simple or “normal” ones such as the one you told me when I left my family and traveled far away to make money, and also the other, more “mythified” ones. And I want to learn to do that in order to heal those traumas and also to help heal other traumatized souls, some even traumatized by myself at some level at some time, whom I have already met in this life, such as my prior wife. I think the idea Stephen gave me about de-mythification has practical application for me so I will keep on thinking on it.

Gonzalo,

  I really like what you wrote there, and the play of your thoughts.  Once a person's life becomes simple, and there is less of 'them' (The Myth of You, so to speak), then there is alot more room for everything else.


  To add to that concept, in terms of what I am trying to accomplish within myself in growing towards Soul identification, and lessen the purely egoic identification:

  I think of 'The Myth of Stephen' in terms of a Noun, which can be thought of as a static definition which is applied to an object, and so this myth is a self-imposed definition of 'Stephen' which may or may not fit me, but certainly is limiting "me" to my ego's self-defining trait/ability.  Perhaps in the EA Paradigm that can be considered as The Trinity of the Past (Pluto, South Node and its Ruler).

    However, there is this evolving "me" which has an unknown self-definition.  (JWG on the DVD "Psychodynamics of the Moon" states something to the effect of 'Embrace Insecurity!')  Insecurity in this sense to me implies the old statement of "Let Go...and Let God!"
  So...this then suggests that I should NOT adhere to a self-defining self-definition (NOUN), but should perhaps move into the moment-by-moment actively evolving action of God'dess-inspired choice (a VERB - if you will).  Therefore, I am not 'Stephen' but am constantly 'Stephening'!
  [In other words, I am therefore not acting from what I think that I am, or what anyone thinks that I am...but am instead acting from what I truly am, which is the inner Soul.]  (Mostly it seems to be working, but it can be painful, because blinding self-definition often carries the story of pain, but VERBing in this way leads to self-analysis, and I have found that true self-analysis can open one up to real pain, from deep within.  Of course, this is the darkness which has to be faced as we move toward healing.  Anyway, it is a path I am currently taking, so, since my 'story' is on this Message Board, then I might as well hint at the tale's current chapter!)
  Perhaps in the EA Paradigm this free will is to find its direction through an awareness of a person's natal chart's Trinity of the Future (Pluto Polarity Point, North node and its Ruler).

  I love feedback (an external viewpoint accepted internally), so anyone let me know what you think, if you so choose.


Blessings to All who Read This,
Stephen(ing!)